


Come Back When You Can

by chrisevnas (orphan_account)



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Bit of Language, Fluff, M/M, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Pre-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Sam Wilson Is a Good Bro, Steve Rogers & Sam Wilson Friendship, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Steve needs therapy, Sweet T'Challa (Marvel), Tooth-Rotting Fluff, all the times steve visited wakanda, bucky is unconscious obviously, i mean he's in cryo, it's just soft steve visiting him
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-02
Updated: 2018-05-02
Packaged: 2019-05-01 06:51:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14514819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/chrisevnas
Summary: Steve visits Bucky in cryo.





	Come Back When You Can

It's not easy for Steve to let Bucky go back into cryostasis. In fact, it goes against anything he's ever known. Bucky promised he would never leave him, all those years ago when he sat crying over his mother on the brunet's bed. Couch cushions on the floor, at first, but later, he joined him in the bed. It seemed practical, because Steve was tiny and asthmatic and Brooklyn could get incredibly cold. By the time they realized what was  _really_ going on, Bucky was well on his way to the war.

 

However, Steve knows that Bucky hasn't had the opportunity to make his own choices for a very long time. He can tell: over the last few weeks, he's only allowed Steve to make his decisions. He can't help but smile at them now, imagining what Bucky -  _his_ Bucky - would think of his submission. Surely he'd kick himself, saying that Steve's the most indecisive son of a bitch he's ever known.

 

So when they had woken up one morning, hiding away in a Brooklyn apartment, and Bucky had asked him if he could decide something, Steve had to listen.

 

"I just," Bucky began, shaking his head. "I can't live like this, Steve. If someone knows those  _words_ , we're back to where we started. You lost everything for this. I can't go back to being that person."

 

"You won't," Steve promised, though he had no idea if he could even hold himself to that. "I won't let you."

 

Bucky folded his lips in for a minute before glancing at his metal arm - or what was left of it, anyway. "The king? T'Challa, I think. He, um, offered me something."

 

Steve's brows pulled together. "Like a job?"

 

The brunet rolled his eyes. "No, dumbass. A... treatment."

 

"Oh?"

 

"Yeah," Bucky sighed, "He said his sister, she's really intelligent. I guess Wakanda isn't the piece of shit the world thinks it is. I'm beginning to think nothing is what the world thinks it is," he murmured, shaking his head. "Anyway, they got this fancy metal. Vibrate Yum, or something? It's what your shield is made out of.  _Was_ made out of."

 

"Vibranium," Steve interrupted, to which he received a cold glare from his best friend. Sheepish and cheeks heating, he mumbled, "Sorry."

 

"Anyway, vibranium, sure. He said they can do really crazy stuff with it. They can heal people. He had his sister look into my life, I guess people have access to that stuff now, and she thinks she can help me. I don't... It might be my only shot, Steve."  


Steve sat next to Bucky on the bed, inhaling sharply before leaning forward and speaking into his lap. "I can't risk you like that."

 

"Well, for once, it's not your choice. You may be the captain of the arrow guy and the witchy girl, but you ain't the captain of me no more. I have to do this, Steve. If I don't, and they reach  _him_ , you're gonna have to kill me."

 

"Don't be ridiculous-"

 

"No!" Bucky shot back. "Stop, Steve. I know, okay? I know there's more and I can't remember it. You don't look at me the way you look at Sam. If you ever want that back, you have to let me do this. Or else you shoot me in the head. Got it?"

 

The room went quiet for a good few minutes before Steve had tears dripping off his chin. Bucky wrapped his arms around Steve from the back, murmuring into his bare skin, "It'll be okay, Stevie. Just trust me."

 

Those memories seem so distant, though they were only two weeks old. He and Bucky traveled to Wakanda privately, compliments of T'Challa, and the king sat both he and Bucky down to explain the treatment, how it would work, what they could expect, and even introduced them to Shuri.

 

"Sergeant, Captain," the young woman addressed them. "I can help you. I know I can. I just need time. Wakanda is heavily protected, and Sergeant Barnes will be safe here. I can promise you that."

 

"How long?" Steve asked, keeping his voice as neutral as possible.

 

Shuri glanced at her brother before clearing her throat. "I anticipate I would need at least a year. His mind... the damage they have done is much deeper than a quick fix. I will need to spend a lot of time with it, and take no chances. I need to be certain he is one-hundred percent before returning him to you."

 

Bucky grabbed Steve's hand off of the table. T'Challa watched but said nothing, instead nudging Shuri. "Let's take a walk, eh?"

 

The young woman nodded and smiled softly at the men before standing and joining her brother.

 

"Stevie?" Bucky whispered. "Tell me what you're thinking."

 

Steve took a deep breath. "I'm thinking I can't seem to keep a hold of you."

 

"You will," Bucky responded. "You will. Once I'm healed, once this is all over, I'm yours, okay? And you can teach me how to fight like a good guy."

 

"You  _are_ a good guy," Steve said, glancing over at the brunet. He was met with wide, steel grey eyes that watered.

 

Bucky huffed out a quiet laugh. "God, Steve. Just let me have a moment, would ya?"

 

Steve could only smile with little conviction in return before it dropped in his realization. "I'm really gonna miss you."

 

"So come visit me."

 

"It's not the same if you don't open your stupid mouth to respond, jerk."

 

"I'm sure you've got a good imagination on you, punk."  


 

Steve laughed, though there were tears in his eyes. "Bucky, I..."

 

"I know," Bucky responded softly. He squeezed Steve's hand three times. "I know."

 

He considers this now, as he draws Bucky's sleeping face. Shuri is across the room, working on a hologram Steve doesn't really understand but somehow works with Bucky's mind. He's focused on Bucky, just Bucky, and the beautiful line of his jaw that Steve was once so familiar with. His beauty always reminded Steve of a greek god, and though his best friend would shove him and grumble in response, it never changed his mind. Bucky's the most beautiful person he's ever known.

 

And maybe Bucky  _had_ noticed he looked at him differently. He hopes it won't change anything when Bucky comes to. He's been worrying about a lot of things happening when Bucky's come to, but he tries not to get caught up in the thought.

 

After all, he has at least a year. It's only day three.


End file.
